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Posts Tagged ‘Relationships’

The (Pacific) OCEAN – Model of Communication

Introducing OCEAN as a way of learning the skills of swimming through life: O = Own the problem; C = Change unhelpful thinking; E = Express the problem; A = Ask for help assertively; and N = Negotiate Now let’s learn OCEAN swimming skills, taking one step at a time. Own the problem is the…

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Mind-reading and False Expectations

Expecting your partner to read your mind and know what will make you happy is unrealistic and leads to disappointment and resentment. This works for both men and women equally. Life would be very tedious indeed if you had to anticipate what others wanted. “It would be like treading on eggshells, worrying about upsetting everyone.…

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Challenging Unhelpful Thoughts

Important! New thoughts do not have to be falsely positive (wishful thinking), but realistic thoughts. The bottom line is to aim for calmness, less anger and/or less anxiety. Shifting in emotion might be enough to produce a more helpful and productive behaviour. So as to work out the new thoughts, it is useful to ask…

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